The Ultimate Guide To Shopping For Your Wedding Dress

In my time away from my own blog I've tried to keep writing so I started writing for HELLO! magazine. I write about weddings, wedding dresses, accessories, ideas etc so I thought I'd share some of my best posts with you all. If you want to read more of my wedding pieces for HELLO! you can find them here. For now here's my ultimate guide to shopping for your wedding dress.

Shopping for The Dress can be a very daunting experience, for many Brides-To-Be its uncharted territory so I've put together an ultimate guide to shopping for your wedding dress with some tips to get you started.

So you have found the love of a lifetime and now its time to find the dress of a lifetime. For some of you its what you've been dreaming of since you watched your first Disney movie, for others its a more alien concept but whether the idea of shopping for your wedding dress has you jumping for joy or breaking out in a cold sweat my ultimate guide will take away the stress and help it be a more fun filled and enjoyable experience.

Before You Go Shopping…

Set Your Budget

The average price of a dress from a boutique is €1,300. You can get the dream dress cheaper and you can also blow the bank but whatever your budget is, stick to it. Don't forget to allow for alterations and accessories like shoes, a veil, a headpiece etc in your budget. The best way to avoid an unwanted surprise or shock about the price when you find your dream dress is to ask the boutique about the price range of their dresses before you make an appointment.

Do Your Research

Buy the wedding magazines, read the blogs, follow the Facebook pages, Instagram's and pinterest boards and keep up to date with celebrity weddings. Do your research on the designers and the boutiques that stock them. Create your own scrapbook or Pinterest board of images of dresses you like. Do bear in mind your own body shape and remember that what looks gorgeous on a 6ft tall model with legs up to her armpits and a 22 inch waist may not look so well on the rest of us mere mortals. No matter what you do you can't grow half a foot taller or loose 3 stone (it has been done but its highly unlikely) so feel free to dream but try to stay realistic.

Your Wedding Dress In Real Time...

When To Start Shopping

Its important to have all the details of your wedding in place before you go shopping for your wedding dress since many factors can influence the style of the dress, for example the venue and the time of year. Once those are in place start to look around, see what you like and what suits you and more importantly what doesn't.

Take Your Time

Don't order your dress too soon. This is for several reasons. First of all if you order it too soon it gives too much time for doubt and temptation to set in. Wedding dress designers release new collections twice a year, just like fashion designers, so if you order your dress too far in advance its possible you might miss a new collection and later feel like you've missed out. Finally, if you are on a diet you want to loose as much weight as possible before ordering your dress so that there are as little alterations as possible to be made when it arrives.

Your Order Deadline

You will need to order your dress 8 months before your wedding date at the latest. Wedding dresses are special order and can take up to 6 months to be made in the factory or design house. You then have to allow for fittings and alterations so its important to stick to the 8 month deadline.

Shopping…

Your Appointment

Most wedding dress shops are by appointment only so don't just assume you can pop in anytime to take a look. Book in advance and bear in mind that Saturdays are generally the busiest days and fill up quickly as do any evening appointments if and when they are available.

Who To Take With You

Too many cooks spoil the broth and too many opinions can spoil a wedding dress appointment. Don't take an entourage. Take no more than 3 people with you and choose people whose opinion you value and trust. Your mam, sister or close friend are always good choices. If you generally shop on your own don't be afraid to go wedding dress shopping on your own, if you see a dress you love you can make an appointment to come back with your family, friends or bridesmaids. Likewise if you have a lot of bridesmaids and you want them to be part of the experience take them with you when you are returning to a shop to see dresses you have already decided you like. Too many voices and opinions can be confusing, you need to be able to hear your own voice and trust your own instincts on what dress makes YOU feel and look good. If there are too many different opinions at the appointment let the sales assistant lead it and direct it, she knows the dresses and will more than likely know what will suit you even if no one else thinks you should try it on. She is there for a reason and she is an expert.

If you have children, leave them at home (with a babysitter of course, or the hubby to be) a wedding dress shop is no place for children. Aside from obvious reasons they will distract you and pull your focus from looking for The Dress.

What To Take With You

Wear appropriate underwear, the sales assistant will be helping you in and out of dresses. Wear a strapless bra and if you usually wear Spanx or support pants wear them too. All shops will have shoes for you to try on with the dresses but its no harm to take a pair of your own. Wear your hair up or take a bobbin as it helps if you are trying on veils and it allows you to get a better look at the necklines and backs of the dresses.

Some shops are fussy about make up and fake tan so its usually advisable to avoid fake tan and wear little or no make up.

In The Appointment...

• First and foremost Be On Time. Your appointment is generally one hour long and if your late, its your own time your eating into. The next appointment will be there on time and will be taken on time.

• Take snapshots, photos or pullouts of dresses you like to give the sales assistant an idea of your taste.

• Not all shops are happy to let you take photos so check before you take out your phones and start snapping, they can get very cross. If you can't take photos get the designer and name or number of the dress so you can look it up online later.

• Be prepared to use your imagination. Shops carry samples of wedding dresses and they will generally have one sample of each dress in one size. You may have to deal with anything from them not zipping up to them being miles too big so you will have to see past this and imagine what it would be like if it fitted you properly.

• Don't get hung up on sizes when you are shopping for your wedding dress as a lot of designers and brands run very small and you may be up to 2 sizes bigger than what you would normally wear.

• Don't get discouraged. If your not getting The Moment in any dress or just not seeing anything you like. Keep your chin up and keep looking. Your dress is out there somewhere and you will find it! Don't tolerate people telling you your fussy, that is a brides prerogative.

• You will order your dress in the size you are on that day, if you are loosing weight don't fret as a dress can be taken in up to 2 sizes without anyone ever noticing.

• Most of all keep An Open Mind. Don't discount any shape or style until you have tried it on. Nine times out of ten a bride will end up falling for a dress that is nothing like she thought she wanted. Listen to the sales assistant, if she says you should try something on, try it, it won't kill you, she knows her job and you will more than likely be pleasantly surprised.

• Have Fun! Its supposed to be a fun exciting experience so enjoy it. Try on some dresses that are completely out of your comfort zone, at the worst of times you'll have a good laugh and you never know it just might be The One.

• Finally… When you do find The Dress Stop Looking. You will only confuse yourself and sew an unwanted seed of doubt.

Don't forget to share this with any friends who are planning their wedding! Happy shopping ladies. Leave a comment below and let me know if you found these helpful xx

Image credits ; Sex And The City, HBO via feminist.us, whererootsandwingsentwine.com, People Magazine, 'Friends', Bright/Kauffman/Crane via goblondes.wordpress.com, 'Licence to Wed', Warner Brothers via seeing-stars.com 

Many thanks to Cera Mc Gahon at My Fair Lady

Its Been A Year Mammy

Its been a year Mam. A whole year since I saw your face. A whole year since you sat across the table from me and chatted as I wrote my last post. A whole year since I saw you warm yourself at the fire. A whole year since I heard the back door open and saw you come walking through. A whole year since I heard your voice and your laugh. And I'll never ever hear them again because its been a whole year since my Mammy took her last breath. On the 26th of January 2014 at 20.15 my Mammy's heart beat for the last time and she left this world, I wonder did she even know she was dying.

Its been a whole year since my world completely shattered in front of my eyes, since I saw my wee Mammy fade away and leave us and there was nothing me or anyone else could do about it. It felt so unreal, like the worst kind of nightmare and I kept hoping Mammy was going to waken me up and life would be as it was. But life was never going to be the same, my Mammy's life was stolen from her and she was cut from our lives like a beautiful rose in full bloom. It was never meant to be like that.

My whole life was ripped to shreds that day. My Mammy was by best friend, she was my hero, she still is my strength and inspiration and I am proud to be her daughter and I will always be so proud and honoured to call her my Mam. I never told her enough how much I appreciated everything she ever did for me. My Mam was so selfless and so full of love, I looked up to her, deep down I always wanted to be just like her. In so many ways my Mammy was the love of my life, I was a real Mammy's girl, I still am. She was one in a million and I miss her so, so much. Losing her left a giant hole in all of our lives and she took a huge part of me with her. My life feels so empty without her and the heartbreak is a real gut wrenching pain that just gets worse. It tears me up inside just how unfair it was on her, my Mammy was only 56 and had so much of her life to live, loads of things we talked about doing and places we talked about going that she will never get to do.

Mammy wasn't sick, it was a sunday and she had been up all night with a tummy bug, the doctor on call was going to take 5 hours to see her so we called the ambulance because she was really sick. Naturally we thought she'd be fine when they got fluids and antibiotics into her in the hospital. I can't even begin to describe what we went through in the hospital that day, what my Mammy went through, as she slipped into a coma and we were told she only had minutes left. We got to spend 2 minutes with her when we got her out of the ambulance, I remember fixing her hair and telling her I'd see her in a bit. We had no idea at that stage what was going to happen, I don't think Mam did either. That was the last time we saw her concious and there was so much more I wish we said. My Mammy was on her own most of that day, with doctors and nurses working to save her life, but they were strangers and I hate that she went through it all alone, that none of us were there to hold her hand and comfort her.

I understand how Lee McQueen felt after his Mammy died, I understand how he felt that he couldn't go on, the want to be in the same place as her just to know that she is okay. I wish I could know how my Mam is, I wish I could know what she was thinking those last few hours, what was going through her head, could she hear what we were saying to her, could she feel us holding her hand, how much pain was she in? I'll never know and hoping just doesn't cut it.

So many images come to my mind when I think of my Mam. Childhood memories of all the little things we did together, memories that I treasure and I wonder why I never talked to her about them when she was here, I suppose its because we both thought we'd have so many more years together, maybe we would have spoke about them if I ever had a daughter. I idolised her then, I idolise her now, I always did. I miss talking to her. We talked about everything, sometimes we'd fight, sometimes we'd laugh but it was always alright because she was my Mammy and I was her 'Dots' as she called me. I loved our days away together, our shopping trips. She had the best eye, she was much better at shopping than me and much more thoughtful. There wasn't a week went by that mam didn't buy something for me a bottle of shampoo she thought I'd like, a fur coat she saw in the charity shop window. I wish I had spoiled her more, she definitely deserved it.

My Mam was always so graceful. Her clothes were so thoughtfully put together, she was every inch the lady and she didn't realise it herself. She was beautiful and she didn't know it. She was so camera shy and now I wish I had encouraged her more to get into photos, maybe one day she could have seen what we saw. I miss her hands, she had the most beautiful, elegant hands and nails. And her handwriting, I always loved her handwriting, I never told her that either.

I hate to think of her alone and I hope she isn't lonely. My Mammy deserved so much more joy out of this life, she gave us so much joy but she was taken before I got a chance to give her some back. I never got to repay her properly for all that she done for us, for all she done for me and all the love she gave. It is so unfair. She saw me take my first breath and I watched her take her last but it never should have been this soon.

We got so much support from our family and friends after Mam passed away. We really can't thank them enough for all they done for us. The whole community came together to say goodbye to Mam. The streets of the town were lined with people paying their respects as we made our way to the chapel for Mams funeral. The chapel was absolutely over flowing. I will never forget it and I wish that she was there to see how much she meant to so many people. She was truly loved.

I haven't written much since my Mam died. I've sat down to try write something so many times but I couldn't. Mam was always here when I was writing, she was such a big part of my blog and it kills me to do it now without her. Mam loved that I was doing something that I loved. She was so proud of me, sometimes I wonder why, but then I was always proud of her just for being her. I knew from that night that whenever I could find the will to write on here again it would have to be about my Mam. I knew I had to tell you all how amazing she was and how proud and honored I am to call her my Mam, all I can do now is talk about her and she deserves to be celebrated. The last thing I wrote with my Mam beside me was her eulogy so I thought I'd share it with you all.

Mammy was an angel on earth and now shes an angel in heaven. For such a little dainty lady she left a huge impression on the lives of all those around her. Her patience always astounded me, when it came to helping people out nothing was ever too much trouble, she had such a natural kindness.

All of the lovely comments and compliments we received about Mammy were a testament to the truly beautiful person she was. She was a true lady, always a smile and a kind word, so thoughtful and helpful and kind. The kind of woman you would love to meet because you would always leave her with a smile.

Mammy was gentle and kind and loving and always went above and beyond to take care of those she loved. She was an amazing Mammy, the best in the world and we can't thank her enough for the life she gave us. The light of her life was her grandson Calum, being a Granny gave her a higher purpose, she idolised her darling wee man.

Mammy taught me the kind of person I want to be. She was our support, our strength and our comfort.I know she is as sad as we are and its for her that my heart is breaking. we had so many special memories but so many left unmade. She was denied so much by being taken so soon. There is not a single second that will go by that we won't think of her and miss her and have something we want to share with her.

I hope Mammy has passed on her strength and love that will give us the ability to make her proud. I hope she can live on through us and enjoy all she missed by standing by our sides when we fulfill all her wishes and dreams.

Mammy you got your wings too soon. Goodbye is not forever, goodbye is not the end. It simple means I miss you until we meet again.

If tomorro starts with out me and I'm not here to see,

If the sun should rise you find your eyes all filled with tears for me,

I wish so much you wouldn't cry the way you did today,

While thinking of the many things we didn't get to say,

I know how much you love me,

As much as I love you,

And each time that you think of me

I know you'll miss me too.

But when tomorrow starts without me please try to understand,

That an angel came and called my name and took me by the hand.

He said my place was ready in Heaven far above,

And that I'd have to leave behind the ones I truly love.

But as I turned and walked awat a tear fell from my eye

For all my life I'd always though I didn't want to die,

I had so much to live for,

So much left yet to do,

It seemed almost impossible

That I was leaving you.

I thought of all the yesterdays the good ones and the bad,

I thought of all the love we shared and all the fun we had.

If I could relive yesterday just even for a while,

I'd say goodbye and kiss you and maybe see you smile.

But then I fully realised that this could never be,

For emptiness and memories would take the place of me.

When I thought of worldly things I might miss come tomorrow,

I thought of you and when I did my heart was filled with sorrow.

So when tomorrow starts without me don't think we're far apart,

For everytime you think of me I'm right here in your heart.

Thank you Mammy. I love you.

Amazing Boho DIY Vintage Wedding Part 2

It's Part 2 time for this incredible DIY-fest of a wedding. There is so much wedding inspiration in this fabulous big day, that I've had to split it in two for risk of blowing your minds! If you've missed Part 1, check it out here. From the wedding stationery to the wedding cakes {yes that's cakes plural}, no details was too small to DIY. I'm loving the recurring owl motif, the hankies '4 tears of joy' the incredible Wedding Land hand-drawn map, the burlap runners, the sweetie favour bar and the vintage camera on each table {to reflect Marissa's love of photography}. I don't think I've ever seen such a personalised wedding, and you can tell it must have been one amazing loved-up party! Huge thanks to the team at W Scott Chester Photography for their incredible pictures, and a heartfelt congratulations to Marissa and Caleb! P.S. If you want to see more pictures from this lovely wedding {plus extra wedding inspiration ideas}, do check out Before the Big Day's Facebook page.

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Amazing Boho DIY Vintage Wedding

If you're a boho bride, a vintage bride, or an obsessed-with-details DIY bride, this wedding is going to knock your socks off! It's an enchanting festival-style affair, with magical wedding details, and a big dollop of homespun fabulousness. I've taken the divide and conquer approach, so instead of flooding your eyeballs with too much wedding inspiration in one go, I'll be publishing the next half of the wedding at lunchtime, so you can enjoy it with your sandwiches. But there's tonnes to feast on in this batch of pictures, so let's get started. Marissa and Caleb celebrated their wedding on a Wednesday since they wanted to say 'I do' on their five year dating anniversary {love this idea!}. They DIY'd tonnes of their wedding details, including the incredible wood ceremony entrance, with its vintage screen doors AND the lovely altar area, with its Anthropologie-style letters and owls. I'm loving Caleb's laid-back style, Marissa's cute DIY broach bouquet {buy a similar one from Etsy}, her handmade floral bunting, her bridesmaids' colour-pop pink dresses plus yellow bouquets, and the personalised fingerprint tree guestbook at the entrance. If you want to create a similar wedding style, but don't have time to do all the wedding details yourself, then I must recommend Etsy weddings, for beautiful homespun products. Huge thanks to the wonderful team at W Scott Chester Photography for capturing every golden moment in such style.

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